Tag: husbands

Confessions of a Part-Time Yeti

Confessions of a Part-Time Yeti

When I was little, my mother insisted that I wear the wooliest possible hat in the winter under the erroneous belief that people lose ninety percent of their body heat through their heads.  I suspected this was an old wives’ tale employed by overbearing mothers to make their kids wear the ugliest hats on the planet. However, without solid proof…

Rubbing Elbows

Rubbing Elbows

I have issues with other people’s elbows. This is not to say that I obsess about them all the time.  No, I only have an issue with them when there is a shared armrest at stake, such as at the movies or on a plane.  The unspoken rule with shared armrests is that you are obligated to find some kind of armrest…

Who Turned Out the Lights?

Who Turned Out the Lights?

When the time came to get new eyeglasses, I decided I was ready for an upgrade. The optician told me I could get the kind of lenses that would turn dark when I was in the sun, so instead of having a regular pair of eyeglasses and a second pair of prescription sunglasses, I’d have one pair that would do…

My Funny Valentine

My Funny Valentine

Being the wonderful guy that he is, my husband knows that the way to my heart is through chocolate. I’m not a snob… really any chocolate will do.  Except the kind with coconut on the inside. Or cherry goop. Or insects.   But other than that, I’m happy to be lavished with any other kind of chocolates.  This has made buying me a…

Hibernating in the Man Cave

Hibernating in the Man Cave

“Joe got a Man Cave,” said my husband, referring to a friend of ours who, apparently, had become a Neantherthal. “Excuse me?” I responded. “He got a Man Cave.  You know, a room in the basement that is just for him.” “And…” “Sounds kind of like a cool idea,” he said wistfully. I shook my head.  “You want a Man…

The Psychic Wives Network

The Psychic Wives Network

After almost 19 years of marriage, my husband and I have finally figured out why sometimes, we have trouble communicating: He can’t read my mind. I know. I was shocked, too. But there it was. And the sad fact was, I was enlightened over a bag of garbage. One morning I came downstairs to find a bag of garbage sitting…