Health

This is My Final Word on This. Period.

This is My Final Word on This. Period.

My good friend Susan recently gave me a medal. This is it. It is not for being a great writer, or a good friend, or a stupendous wife. It’s for being the Oldest Living Menstruating Woman on the Planet. Honestly, I didn’t know they give medals for stuff like that, but Susan says they do, and she is a humor-writing,…

What Goes Down Must Come Out!

What Goes Down Must Come Out!

“Everything looks great,” exclaimed my internist at my annual check up. “But there’s one more thing,” “What?” I wondered. “Well, now that you’re in your fifties you get an extra special gift.” I was so excited.  I never had a doctor give me a gift before.  As far as I knew none of my friends ever got a gift from…

The Tooth and Nothing but the Tooth

The Tooth and Nothing but the Tooth

Recently I had to go to the drugstore to buy a tube of toothpaste. It took me an hour and a half and I almost had a nervous breakdown. In all honesty, I absolutely believe that there are people in psychiatric hospitals right now who are there as a direct result of shopping for toothpaste. In fact, in the top…

Being a Good Sport

Being a Good Sport

“It’s Tennis Elbow,” my doctor said matter-of-factly. “That’s impossible,” I responded, as I massaged my sore elbow.  “I don’t play tennis.” She sighed.  “It’s just called that because it’s a repetitive injury that is commonly seen in tennis players.” “Well, the only thing I do repetitively with that arm is change the channel with my remote.  In fact,” I continued,…