’Twas a week before Christmas and our wallets were bare…

There wasn’t so much as a dollar in there

The gift cards were purchased, the stockings were stuffed

Even the eggnog tureen had been buffed.


The bonus was gone, the tips had been tipped

The gift to Aunt Martha had finally been shipped.

The lines at the mall were still crazy long

Price surging on ride shares was still going strong


The kids were safe studying in their college beds

as visions of Venmo checks danced in their heads.

Some gathered together to watch old Game of Thrones

While others schemed how to get cool new IPhones.


But back at our house as we tried to get cozy

A loud noise suggested that all was not rosy.

Someone was walking on top of the house

And that someone was bigger for sure than a mouse.


A burglar? An alien? What could it be?

Something was headed straight for our chimney.


And then with an “oomf” and an “ugh” he came down,

Not through the chimney but down to the ground.

With big rosy cheeks and good cheer galore

Our mystery roof-walker appeared at the door.


“I’m the guy that you called, I’m a roofer named Kringle

All that snow that just fell?  It ruined your shingles.

“You need a new roof,” said the man dressed in red

“If you don’t do it soon it’ll fall in on your head.”



We looked at the tuition bills tossed on the table

The bills for electricity, water, and cable

Then we gave him a Visa to clean up the mess

Because Kringle won’t take American Express.


©2020, Lost Media Entertainment. All rights reserved. Follow Tracy on her Facebook Fan page at Facebook.com/LostinSuburbiaFanPage,  join the Lost in Midlife group at facebook.com/groups/lostinmidlife/ and follow on Instagram @TracyinMidlife


  • Carol Baron

    Just love your holiday columns. Laughing is good for my health. Thank you.

  • Ingrid Dyrcz

    Liked it

  • Ncruz

    Thank you – I so needed to laugh! Merry Christmas

    • Tracy Beckerman

      Merry Christmas to you too!!

  • Susan

    Thank you for sharing your amazing talent for making us laugh.

    • Tracy Beckerman

      Thanks for subscribing Susan!

  • Tracy Beckerman

    Thanks Mom!! You taught me that laughter is the best medicine!

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