“I got an invitation on Facebook to join the Magnetic Eyelashes Fan Group,” I told my husband as I stared at my computer screen.

“What does that even mean,” he asked incredulously.

“It’s a group on Facebook for people who like Magnetic Eyelashes, I assume.”

“Is that a thing?” he said.

“Apparently,” I said. “Although I have no idea what a magnetic eyelash is and why I got an invite.”

I sighed. This wasn’t the first time I’d been invited to join a weird group on Facebook. It seemed like recently the invites were coming faster and faster and the groups were becoming more and more obscure. There was the group for “People Who Prefer Camels with One Hump, Not Two.” Yet another group called, “When I was Your Age Pluto Was a Planet.” And the ever popular, “Friends Don’t Let Friends Wear Mom Jeans.” I was invited to each of these and I can’t fathom why. I don’t really have any opinions one way or another about any of these, and especially the number of humps a camel should have. I’m more concerned with not getting too close to a camel so I don’t get spit on.Since my Facebook friends were the ones who were inviting me to join Facebook groups, it occurred to me that I didn’t need to stop getting Facebook group invites. I needed to get some new Facebook friends.

“I got another invite for a group called, ‘I Always Push the Door that says Pull,’” I continued.

“What is there to talk about in that group?” my husband wondered.

“Not much, I guess. I think it’s more about keeping out the people who pull the door that says push,” I said.

There was the group for “People Who Prefer Camels with One Hump, Not Two.” Yet another group called, “When I was Your Age Pluto Was a Planet.” And the ever popular, “Friends Don’t Let Friends Wear Mom Jeans.”

“You know, there is a way to stop getting these group invites,” said my husband.

     The “Friends Don’t Let Friends Wear Mom Jeans” Group

“What?”

“Stop going on Facebook,” he said.

“I can’t do that,” I replied.

“Why not?”

“Because then I wouldn’t know what stupid Facebook groups my friends are all joining.“

He sighed and left the room. But the issue gnawed at me. Every time I went on Facebook, I was being bombarded by invites. In the past 24 hours, I got invites to “People Who Suffer from the Fear that Somewhere, Somehow, a Duck is Watching You,” “Gnomes are People, too,” and the somewhat relatable, “I Use the Word Thingy When I Forget What It’s Called,” which is a group I might actually join. It got to the point where I was so busy deleting group requests that I almost didn’t have time to tell all my friends I secretly prefer camels with one hump.

 

“You know, all these invites got me thinking,” I finally said to my husband. “I decided I’m going to start my own Facebook Group.”

“What is it?” he said.

“People on Facebook Who Hate Facebook Groups.“

 

©2020, Beckerman. All rights reserved. Follow Tracy on her Facebook Fan page at Facebook.com/LostinSuburbiaFanPage,  join the Lost in Midlife group at facebook.com/groups/lostinmidlife/ and follow on Instagram @TracyinMidlife

 

1 Comment

  • Sharon Dillon

    So relatable.
    Regrettably, I still wear jeans. I can’t see my backside when I walk. So I assume that view looks as good as it did when I was 20.
    Hope your back is working again.
    sd

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